


Scars on her back

by Aainiouu



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Little bit of angst, Post-Season/Series 04, Season/Series 05, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2019-03-08 18:51:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13464387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aainiouu/pseuds/Aainiouu
Summary: When he opened the door, he realized that in fact she hadn’t. She was standing with her back to him reaching to reach something on her back, but the fact that started Bellamy the most was that she wasn’t wearing a shirt.“Oh shit… sorry.” Bellamy said and turned away; he didn’t see but heard Clarke turning around.“It’s okay, you can turn,“ Clarke said and Bellamy turned and saw Clarke holding her shirt against her chest, “Is everything okay?”Basically some season 5 feels, because why the hell not





	Scars on her back

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick little fic about feels. It just came to me so... :D
> 
> I haven't written anything for this fandom and haven't written anything for so long, but oh well, here we go.

Bellamy was watching Clarke as they were sitting around the fireplace with a fire build from fallen branches and dead trees from the outskirts of the Eden. Clarke was quite adamant that live trees would not be harmed because the ecosystem was so fragile, so Clarke had disappeared for couple of hours during the day and came back with a sack full of firewood. Bellamy found it kind of amazing that Clarke knew weather so well, because the night was colder than any that they had encountered back on the earth so far and Clarke knew this and said that they needed to build a fire in the fireplace. 

Madi had gone to sleep about an hour earlier and now they were just telling told stories from the last time they were all on earth, but Clarke had stayed silent and she had been getting more and more restless as the night had progressed. A painful tug in Bellamy’s chest, that had been a constant companion to him since they met Clarke again for the first time, appeared again when he didn’t really know what to say to make Clarke relax. He swallowed and looked at his hands and when he looked back up Raven caught his eye and looked at him sadly and as Bellamy gave a sad smile back, Clarke got up, startling everyone. 

“I need to check on some… stuff outside.” Clarke said silently as she realized that everyone was staring at her. She looked at them like she wanted to say something else, but then decided against it, turned around and left through a door. 

A deep silence landed in the room after she had left. Bellamy stared forward, but could see that Monty was looking around at everyone. Bellamy didn’t know what to do. He knew that it must be so hard for Clarke to see them again and that she needed some time alone, but he wanted to talk to her, to reach out and bring her back to him and he didn’t know how.

“I’m gonna go and try to talk to her.” Monty said and went to stand up, but Bellamy grabbed his hand. 

“I’ll go. I…” Bellamy frowned and didn’t know what to say really, but Monty sat back down and patted his shoulder. Clarke had given them jackets and furs to stay warm and he tugs a jacket on and drapes a fur around his shoulders. 

It was really cold outside and wind was blowing, making it even colder. Bellamy squinted and looked around trying to see where Clarke was. Then he saw a light coming from one of the buildings, where Bellamy knew that Clarke kept food and medicine. He walked briskly to the building and knocked on the door. He couldn’t hear Clarke saying anything over the wind, but he thought that Clarke must’ve heard him. 

When he opened the door, he realized that in fact she hadn’t. She was standing with her back to him reaching to reach something on her back, but the fact that started Bellamy the most was that she wasn’t wearing a shirt. 

“Oh shit… sorry.” Bellamy said and turned away; he didn’t see but heard Clarke turning around.

“It’s okay, you can turn, “Clarke said and Bellamy turned and saw Clarke holding her shirt against her chest, “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, I just… Is everything okay?” he parroted back, making Clarke snort. It was the best sound that Bellamy had heard on the earth and he smiled. 

“Yeah… I needed to… I have scars on my back,” Clarke looked down and shrugged, “from Praimfaya. They are itchy when it gets cold and I didn’t want to wake Madi up. She usually spreads the salve on my back. She says that she’s a doctor when she does that.” A warm smile spread on Clarke’s face when she talked about Madi and Bellamy smiled back. It was somehow easier to talk to Clarke, when it was just the two of them and in the candlelight. 

“I could… If you need… I…” Bellamy clears his throat now feeling a little bit nervous, “Do you need help?”  
Clarke’s jaw dropped a little and Bellamy immediately felt stupid. Not stupid because he suggested it, but because he stuttered so much. It was not a big deal, or it shouldn’t be a big deal, at least not to him. Clarke cringed. 

“It’s not… pretty. I don’t want to disgust you.” Clarke laughed, but Bellamy could see that was not from real amusement, but from some kind of ugly version of it. 

“Clarke… You could never disgust me,” his voice came out a little breathlessly, because he was feeling sad that Clarke would think something like that. “Come on, please.”  
Clarke was looking a little hesitant but then offered Bellamy a little jar of salve and turned around. Bellamy sucked a breath from between his teeth and then realized his mistake when Clarke turned back around and took the jar from his hand. Bellamy didn’t have time to react before Clarke was watching him under her lashes and for Bellamy’s devastation; her eyes were getting a bit watery. 

“Clarke…” he started, but Clarke interrupted him.

“I’m sorry Bellamy. Maybe you should just leave. I can do it myself, or not do it at all, it doesn’t matter.”

Bellamy had matured quite a bit in the years he spent in the space, but something about Clarke brought the old impatient Bellamy back and he snatched the jar back. Then he calmed again and looked at the salve in his hands. Clarke was suddenly too close for him to be honest and looking her directly at her eyes. 

“I wasn’t… disgusted or anything like that. I just… never really thought about what Praimfaya did for you. I left you behind and looking at the evidence what I did for you. It just shocked me.”

Bellamy was turning the jar in his hands and swallowed all the feelings that rose to his throat. He knew that he couldn’t have stayed and all in all everything went better than he never imagined during the nights after they got to the ring, but it just made him a little upset, a little angry, that Clarke had to go through it all. Then he saw shaking hands reaching for his and he looked back up at Clarke who was smiling again, sadly, with unshed tears in her eyes.

“I never blamed you, you need to know that. You all would’ve died, if you stayed. I was angry, yes, but never at you. The thought of you kept me alive for all these years. It is just hard for, sometimes, to be around you and remember how I’ve changed; mentally I’m in a better place, but physically… I have scars on me and I don’t care, not really, but well… we all have our own insecurities.”

Bellamy took his hand and swiped away some hair on her face.

“There is really no need to feel insecure around me,” he whispered and a fleeting need to kiss her came to, but luckily before he did anything stupid Clarke stepped away and turned her back on him again.

“Please, Bellamy,” she said, shaky and Bellamy tipped his fingers in the salve and touched the scars gently. Clarke let out a shaky breath, muttered something about cold fingers, and Bellamy chuckled. As he continued spreading the salve the tension in the room broke and Bellamy started feeling comfortable again. What they were doing, it was intimate, but born out of necessity and he felt like that maybe this kind of intimacy was something that would heal the gap between them. When he finished, Clarke tugged on her shirt again and when she turned, he saw that a vibrant blush had spread on her cheeks. They were really close to each other and Clarke took his hands and wiped them on the hem of her shirt. 

“I don’t have any more shirts that will fit you, so…” she cleared her throat. “I’m going to go and sleep. We need to rise early tomorrow. Goodnight.” she slipped away, but before she could leave Bellamy took her hand and squeezed it.

“Goodnight,” he said and Clarke disappeared through a door. Bellamy stood there for a moment, shook his head to clear it, and followed.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, and please leave kudos or comments if you like it! :)
> 
> Please forgive me for any mistakes, it's unbetaed and english is not my first language.


End file.
